Bring on the real joy in your relationship...
If someone offered you a 19% increase of happiness in your relationship, would you take it?
Though it often seems we need a certain set of circumstances to be happy - like more time in the day or enough money in the bank - that actually isn’t the case. On some level, I think most of us know that. What, then, can make us happier in our relationships? In life?
As a couples therapist in Denver, I believe to my core that we find happiness when we feel loved, appreciated and not-alone in life. This might imply that FEELING loved, appreciated and connected is enough. Nope! Something very important and impactful happens within us when we SHARE those feelings with the ‘someone’ we care about! The act of taking the risk to share your feelings with your partner is what really brings on the joy! So, it seems that keeping those feelings to ourselves limits us to only half the reward.
The creative folks at SoulPancake show how this plays out as it pertains to gratitude. FEELING grateful for someone special in your life us feels good, but SHARING that gratitude WITH that someone is what really brings on the joy! It is true - something happens in the reward center of our brain that says ‘NOW I feel happy’. I love it.
Sharing our deeper feelings comes with risk, which is probably why we don’t do it freely. Saying ‘thank you for going to the grocery store’ or ‘thank you for dinner last night’ isn’t all that risky. But saying ‘thank you for believing in me’ or ‘thank you for being patient with me’ is so honest and can make you vulnerable in your relationship. When we take the risk, and it is received with appreciation and love, our happiness meter sky rockets!
Do you and your partner have a hard time taking the risk of expressing your feelings? Are you afraid of feeling vulnerable? Is it hard to share good things like gratitude and appreciation because it feels awkward? Do you want more joy in your relationship? We can help you.
Whether your relationship has been struggling for a while, or you just want some new tools to keep your closeness alive, our Hold Me Tight® couples workshop can help! Spend two days with your special someone and learn how to increase the happiness in your relationship!
For more information, please visit Hold Me Tight®